Ever, in your life, have you wondered what it would be like to run around as a goat and cause utter destruction and mayhem to a town? Chances are, this thought has never once crossed your mind, and that’s okay because Coffee Stains Studios has answered that question for us. Thanks to the newest generation of goat simulation technology, this game is exactly as the title suggests, you play a goat…yes you read that right, a goat. Unlike most goats though, all this one seems to want is to cause mass chaos instead of eating some nice green grass. First available for the PC gamers out there, now owners of the Xbox 360 and the Xbox One can live out their dreams of being a goat!
Now, if you’re like me, the first time hearing the words “Goat Simulator,” you probably think it’s either a really stupid game or maybe a game for children. Well, the first one is kind of right. That being said though, that’s the whole point! Run around as a goat, head butting people, causing explosions, destroying homes, etc.
There is just so much you can do in this game. For instance, like licking a helicopter with your goat tongue, that can stretch way more than it should, as it takes you up the roof of a skyscraper. What’s on the skyscraper you may ask? None other than Deadmau5 hosting a concert. This is just one of the random events that fill this odd little game.
There’s no story to follow, so we are left wondering why this goat decided today would be the day to ruin small rural areas. The game is also hilariously buggy but it’s meant to be. More bugs than you’ve ever seen in a game, I found myself trapped inside cars, mountains, at one point one of the civilians of the town were even bugged to the point that they were sticking out of my goat as if we were some weird mutant hybrid, but that’s what makes this game so fun. The developers have said they kept every bug in besides the one that would cause the game to crash. So chances are, you might find yourself trapped in a wall too, or accidentally fling yourself up to the moon, but don’t worry, you can respond and happily go on your way of being a goat. I can’t say that enough, you spend this game being a goat!
One of my favorite features is the ragdoll effects. Throw yourself in front of a passing car, trigger the ragdoll effect and watch your body fly. You can also move objects with your tongue, just lick and they’ll stick, because apparently goat tongues are extra sticky and hold as strong as an octopus’s tentacle. You’ll begin to rack up points throughout the game for every action you perform, the point system has been compared to that of the Tony Hawk Pro Skater games, where as you do tricks you earn points, combo tricks together and you earn even more points. It’s generally the same concept here, everything you do besides running can earn you points. Headbutting objects, doing flips, jumping on trampolines, riding rollercoasters, the possibilities are nearly endless.
There’s no real reason for these points besides comparing with friends and arguing who is the master of the goat race, or if you’re an achievement hunter and love racking up your gamerscore. These points are also followed by random tasks you can do, such as wall run for a certain time limit, cause an object to fly a certain distance, and so forth. There are also mutators you can achieve that will add abilities to your goat, or change their appearance in certain ways. Such as when you win the sumo style goat match, you will become buff and it is totally ridiculous looking, or you can even attach a jet pack to your back and fly with a poor controls. Half the time in the air, you’ll spend it spinning out of control, and hoping you don’t smash into the side of one of the homes. The game even grants you a halo if you spend a certain amount of time without causing any damage, because you know, being such a good goat is fun. Chances are though, you’ll spend more time as a four legged demolition machine and just doing random things over worrying about how many point you’ve earned.
For what it is though, the game is surprisingly fun and will make you laugh, a lot at certain times. It’s more enjoyable if you’re playing with friends, or even if they’re just sitting there watching you play. The amount of ridiculousness that comes from this title is amazing. Who ever would have thought being a goat would be this much fun, I know I didn’t. I will say, this is one game that I can’t sit down and play for hours, I can only be a goat for so long before I start to want more out of it, but in small doses it’s a blast. If you’re looking for that game that’s cheap, and can help pass the time with little to follow, look no further. It’s important to point out, don’t take this game seriously, if you do, you’re just setting yourself up for disappointment. The game is dumb but fun. I mean, what else would you expect from a game that makes you be a goat?
REVIEW CODE: A complimentary Microsoft Xbox One code was provided to Brash Games for this review. Please send all review code enquiries to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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